Urch RP Support & Discussion

Server Discussion => Accepted Applications => Topic started by: explode136 on November 06, 2010, 10:41:39 am



Title: [Accepted]Grethgar[Lizardman]
Post by: explode136 on November 06, 2010, 10:41:39 am
IGN: Octochow

Name: Grethgar the watcher

Race: Lizardman

Traits/Physical Description: Grethgar is 8 feet tall. he has 2 green eyes and a very dark green skin colour. He is much stronger then an average man but small for his race of Lizardman so not as strong as other lizardmen, and like most lizardmen he is very fast but faster then a normal lizardmen because of his smaller stature.

Bio: Grethgar was born deep with in the Spinerunner lizardmen tribes island volcano he was born with his 3 other siblings all heirs to there father him being the chief of there tribe. He was much smaller then his siblings and thus had to fight to obtain things that came easy to others, but this made him stronger and when his father died his eldest brother murdered his 2 other brothers and left Grethgar be because he knew he would never be chief of the tribe when his brother was named chief he banished Grethgar to be the watcher of there secret idol and was the key to all there power for the rest of this Life 50 years later Grethgar had become a seasoned warrior protecting the idol from thousand of bandits and warring tribes he had become stronger then his brother the chief, noticing this his brother ordered Grethgar to be excuted. When they came for Grethgar he slaughted the warriors that came for him but instead of now going for his brother he left, knowing that once his brother spared his life and he has now returned the favor. Grethgar now wanders the world exiled but still watching, always watching.

Gear: Grethgar has 1 very large axe with a smaller shield that has a razor edge, He has leather made armour that he conceals with a black cloak and hood, he has no magical abilities and is thus very vunerable to all forms of magic.


Title: Re: Octochow character application.
Post by: Urch on November 06, 2010, 02:39:44 pm
There are a few problems with your app. Firstly, the entire bio is filled with ridiculously long run-on sentences. Second, lizardmen only live around 50 years at the oldest. and third, i don't quite know why you have a [demon] tag in your name. apart from this however, the application is actually fairly sound and interesting.


Title: Re: Octochow character application.
Post by: explode136 on November 06, 2010, 06:25:05 pm
There are a few problems with your app. Firstly, the entire bio is filled with ridiculously long run-on sentences. Second, lizardmen only live around 50 years at the oldest. and third, i don't quite know why you have a [demon] tag in your name. apart from this however, the application is actually fairly sound and interesting.

Ya sorry about the really long sentances i just really like to rp and i really like to play minecraft so i was kinda excited when i wrote this but ya the reason i had demon was because i was reading the differant things about each and i thought the info i was reading was from the fairy/demon section but later realized it was in the lizardman section so i went in and changed in, and ive done so again correcting the parts you noted on. I also didn't change the bio just because i kinda like the whole story ive told here and don't really want to comprimise what ive already done here, please tell me if thats a problem and id be gald to fix it.